March Makes Me Mad(ness)

So it’s March.

Birds are chirping, rebirth, trees are getting green again.

I hate the cliches about spring and stuff but I love the weather.

But this isn’t a weather blog. I wish it was sometimes…

Anyway.

March Madness. The brackets. Bracketology. Joe Lunardi’s 1 week job.

This is a timeless idea. Fantastic. My favorite time in the college basketball season for everyone.

However, this ‘bracket’ has been… to put it lightly… castrated… by anyone who wants to have a competition to decide anything ever.

They are a dime a dozen and frankly the concept just wears thin after this many. Heck, it wears thin after one copy.

Here are some of the more egregious ones:

  • Muppet Madness

First off. Where are the seeds? Is Kermit a 1-seed? Elmo’s a 3-seed? Fraggle Rock gets its own region?

I know. Everyone looooooves Fraggle Rock. “Dude, that show’s epic! I loved it when I was a kid!” (Yes, if you still talk about Fraggle Rock you also say ‘epic’. Two strikes.)

But let’s be honest. Whoever made this bracket is totalllllllly stretching.

Stretching worse than someone who’s about to run a marathon? I don’t think that’s a very funny analogy.

  • Book Madness

This is a contest for novels released this year.

No one reads novels released this year except for JK Rowling and Jodi Picoult (Some terrible writer. She’s on top of the NY Times Best Sellers right now. Sue me.)

Probably could have ended that sentence after reads.

No one reads.

  • Fug Madness

This is a contest for celebrities who dress in ‘fugly’ clothes.

Besides the questionable name, this is really stupid.

I have a well-publicized feud with the concept of celebrity pandering and pay attention to them. (It’s not well-publicized, but it does exist.)

One of the 1-seeds is Lady Gaga. I find that to be disgusting. I love her fashion.

She’s hot.

(I’m kidding.)

  • Korean Madness

I really lost steam with that last one. I’ll try to get it back.

This is a bracket where you pick your favorite Korean Food recipes.

If that doesn’t explain why it’s on this list, then you should stop reading my blog.

Now I think I’ll mock Korean food.

There’s a HUGE match-up of GukBap against Gwajul/Yakgwa in the Northern Quarters.

Up until this point, GukBap has really been the story of this tournament.

In the first round, it blew out Daedonggang SungeoGuk, a dish I had in my Final Four.

Look for that dish to run into a roadblock against Gwajul/Yakgwa. They breezed through to this stage, blowing their previous opponents out by an average margin of 88-12.

That’s all the energy I can muster up to mock this Korean food bracket.

Hey.

Someone pour me a delicious, piping hot bowl of GukBap. It looks really good.
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