NFL Preview: NFC West


Seattle Seahawks

Matt Hasslebeck is maybe the most overrated quarterback in the history of the world. That and the ‘Hawks got jobbed out of Super Bowl XL. Yes, I remember that nonsense. Look it up.

Nickname: Matt “His Back is a Hassle” Hasslebeck.

Projected Record: 3-13.

Shaun Alexander and Seal
Shaun Alexander and Seal

Arizona Cardinals

Not only is Larry Fitzgerald’s smile delicious, his hair is too. Oh and Anquan Boldin survived like death (See video below). And Kurt Warner’s like 1,000. This team is like the definition of scrappy. Sorry David Eckstein, the title has passed over you.

Nickname: Edgerrin “The Edge” James. He’s a Seahawk now? What?

Projected Record: 12-4.

St. Louis Rams

Marc Bulger sucks.

Nickname: Steven “The Only Good Player on the Team” Jackson. And he’s not even that good.

Projected Record: 2-14.

Marc Bulger
Marc Bulger, sucking.

San Francisco 49ers

Alex Smith is the quarterback of the future. Let him know when the future gets here. He’s going to go back to sitting on the bench.

Nickname: Frank “As good at running as Al” Gore. Except Al Gore scored more TDs! Hiyo!

Projected Record: 1-15.

Alex Smith
Alex Smith

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