NFL Preview: NFC East

But first: A Word about Consistency.

I decided to come back. Officially. So now expect 5-6 posts a week. Yepperz.

Unless I get lazy. Yeah, I’m not in an accountable sorta mood. Sorry.

These NFL Preview posts should be brief. So I’ll try to jam jokes in.

Dallas Cowboys

They would be lucky to win 16 games. I’m projecting them to get a wild card though.

Nickname of a guy on the team: Shawn Marion Jones The Barbarian Barber of Fleet Street.

Projected Record: 9-7

Wade Phillips

Philadelphia Eagles

Their whole team is like 5,000 years old combined. Trust me. I did the math. Although they do have Mike Vick and Jeremy Maclin. That’s like Wildcat Central. I do love the Wildcat. Hmmmm. Pencil them in for 15 wins.

Nickname: Ron Mexico Jr. (Jeremy Maclin) P.S. Ron Mexico was Mike Vick’s alias in the Dog Fighting Nonsense.

Projected Record: 15-1

Donavan McNabb

Washington Redskins

Their team name sucks. Like its kinda racist. But also stupid. P.S. Jason Campbell is a beast. Get him in your fantasy league. He can throw to… Santana Moss? I guess that could work.

Nickname: Jimmy Crack Corn Zorn. (Jim Zorn) He’s the HC. HC means Head Coach.

Projected Record: 0-16

Santana Moss

New York Giants

Eli Manning still sucks. But he got like wayyy too much money. Give that money to something worthwhile or something. Like something. Something.

Nickname: Tom “The Definition of Ruddy Cheeks” Coughlin.

Projected Record: 6-10

Tom Coughlin
Tom Coughlin

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