The NFL Draft

2 things I don’t like about it.

1.

The last two years.

What has happened?

Oh nothing. The team’s with the first pick just announced their pick BEFORE DRAFT DAY.

I mean its like telling your wife you’re going to buy a diamond necklace for her birthday to surprise her, except then you realize, telling her the surprise RUINS THE SURPRISE.

I mean do you REALLY think the world/your wife wants their/her surprise ruined?

There is no legitimate reason to tell the world/her before draft day/her birthday.

Wow.

That was a good analogy.

When I read that Matt-Staff was going first on FRIDAY NIGHT, I was like “C’monnnnn”

STOP DOING THAT, NFL.

Whoever the commish is needs to stop this ASAP.

Punish them by taking away their pick or their money or their pride.

And now I know what you’re thinking.

“If they have the first pick, they have no pride right? Cuz they finished last and all, right?”

And now you know what I’m thinking.

“This year, the Lions should have no pride, but in years past, the 1st Pick Teams (or FPTs as I like to call them) have has at least one win, so yeah, there’s some pride there, babe.”

Enough about that.

The ball's in your court, Roger Goodell. The football that is.
The ball's in your court, Roger Goodell. The football that is.

2.

Mel Kiper Jr.

How can anyone seriously care about anything but the first like 20ish picks (if you’re a hxcore [hxcore means hardcore {what too many parentheses <parentheses? I don’t know>}] draft fan) or like 5 if you really don’t care.

The only exception to this rule, the exception that proves the rule really.

Your favorite team’s picks.

That is the only reason to watch anything on Day 2.

And even then.

He's a vampire.
He's a vampire.
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