MLB Preview: NL East

im going to brief you on every team.

10 words or less.

also a nickname for their star player.

today is NL East.

NY Mets:

Johan Santana is good. But they’re the METS.

Carlos “My belt just ran away” Beltran.

Jose Reyes: Swaggin'
Jose Reyes: Swaggin

Flo rida Marlins:

Dontrelle Willis. Shawty got low low low. I don’t know.

Hanley Ramirez aka HanRam. No. Embellishment. Needed.

HanRam should be in an R&B group.
HanRam should be in an R&B group.

Atlanta Braves:

Racially insensitive.

Derrick “got low low low” Lowe. (2 Flo Rida references. ftw.)

Jeffy Francouer likes puppies.
Jeffy Francouer likes puppies.

Washington Nationals:

Call them the Wqowrgoasidf Nasldjfoiuqwre because they make no sense.

Christian “shouldn’t still have a job” Guzman.

Ronnie Belliard (Note: He is not an Indian anymore. Also he is not blurry anymore.)
Ronnie Belliard (Note: He is not an Indian anymore. Also he is not blurry anymore.)

Philadelphia Phillies:

Ryan Howard hits phome pruns. Phun puns! p

Jayson “Werthless” Werth.

Chase Utley enjoys hanging out in barren hallways that are shawdowy.
Chase Utley enjoys hanging out in barren hallways that are shawdowy.
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