lance armstrong.
he asked ME for an interview.
he wants to get his story out to the 5 people that will read this.
yes, i am talking to YOU.
anyway here it is.
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FantastikSports: Hey Lance.
Lance Armstrong: Sup. I have a question. What do I call you?
FS!: Just call me Sheryl Crow.
LA: That is both really stupid and really hurtful.
FS!: You aren’t that familiar with this blog are you?
LA: Nope.
FS!: Oh. Anyway. How’s the c-bone?
LA: Oh you know, same old.
FS!: Really? Because it was in 4 chunks. That sounds like different new, not same old.
LA: Yeah well. When you have won the Tour De France 7 times in a row, broken collarbones don’t hurt you anymore.
FS!: Oh so you mean compared to the pain of the Tours, this is nothing?
LA: No i mean winning that many times makes your collarbone, and only your collarbone, does not hurt every.
FS!: That makes no sense.
LA: Not to you.
FS!: Anyway. Enough easy questions. Did you use steroids?
LA: Yes. And i know what you’re thinking, but it wasnt like that.
FS!: How was it not “like that”?
LA: Don’t ask questions.
FS!: Well if i can’t ask questions, this is going to be an awkward interview.
LA: Story of my life.
FS!: How? How is THAT the story of your life?
LA: It just felt right.
FS!: How do you feel about your nicknames?
LA: I didn’t think i had any nicknames.
FS!: Well there’s Sir Lancealot. Mr. Tour. And then there’s another one thats kind of offensive.
LA: What is it?
FS!: Have you never heard it?
LA: Noperroni.
FS!: Lance CollarboneWeak
LCW: What does that even mean?
FS!: Well see.. your real name is ArmStrong.
LCW: No its just Armstrong, not ArmStrong.
FS!: Oh okay. Anyway. Armstrong, and you broke your collarbone, its a play on your last name.
LCW: It seems stupid. Whoever made it up is stupid.
FS!: Yeah. That’s true. But he probably has a pretty cool blog, don’t ya think?
LCW: Why would I think that?
FS!: No reason. Hey, when we see the guy who made up that cruel, but awesome nickname, let’s beat him up.
LCW: Yeah. Do you know where we can find this dude?
FS!: No. I have never heard anything about him. Or his blog.
************************************
So there you have it.
Lance Armstrong is looking for you, person who made up that nickname.
P.S. It was me Lance.
P.P.S. Lance Armstrong said Nopperoni. Which is a combination of Nope and Pepperoni.
P.P.P.S. Noperroni ftw.
Matt + Lance 4eva!
3 Comments
April 9, 2009 at 8:43 am
This is very hot info. I think I’ll share it on Twitter.
April 11, 2009 at 5:26 pm
ya im gunna twitter this
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